TV Freak Scott Goodings is crazy about TV. Scott's first TV memory is an
episode of "Matlock Police" called "A Piece Of Cake". His first experience of
the medium in colour was seeing a Hector The Cat road safety commercial through
the window of the CBA bank in Cheltenham in 1975. Catch his regular reviews at
Quickflix
.
Quickflix Australian Rules
The obsession in antipodean contemporary life that is Australian Rules football
is rarely reflected in our fictional television. While former Hawthorn and
Brisbane Bear Rob Dickson won $500,000 on Australian Survivor, and
ex-St Kilda player Michael Roberts was a gift shop model on Sale of the Century,
Mark ‘Jacko’ Jackson had to venture overseas to achieve Hollywood stardom in
the 80s US action series The Highwayman. Okay, Dermott Brereton might
have played a dodgy mechanic in Stingers, and Robert ‘Dipper’
DiPierdomenico was an amphetamine addicted truckie in The Flying Doctors, but
we’re seriously expected to believe characters like Home and Away’s Ryan
Sutherland once played for the Sydney Swans?!? Sometimes TV gets footy right,
sometimes it doesn’t. Watch these and judge for yourself.
- Scott
Reverend Mother Superior Placido
Check out the episode
"The Return of Father Lundigan" on The Flying Nun -Season 2 - Disc 1 (1967)
Late 60s TV saw Sally Field make the transformation from surfer Gidget Lawrence
to a nun whose diminutive frame and starched habit headgear enabled her to fly.
Where sensitive Gidget needed the shoulder of her understanding college
professor Dad to occasionally lean on, Sister Bertrille (Field) receives firm
guidance in the Puerto Rican Convent San Tanco from Mother Superior. This
episode uses the stellar 60s standard sitcom plot which sees characters
hypnotised. Father Lundigan makes a return visit to the nuns, unaware that
Sister Bertrille and Mother Superior assume each others’ personality whenever
they hear the word ‘red’. Iconic cameos come from Paul Lynde as the Father (in
between roles as Uncle Arthur in “Bewitched” and Mildew Wolf in the classic
cartoon “It’s The Wolf”) and Bernie Kopell (Siegfried in “Get Smart”) as Dr
Paredes.
Ria Parkinson – pre-“American Beauty”/“Desperate Housewives” middle-class
malaise
Check out
Butterflies-Series 1 - Disc 1 (1978)
Ria Parkinson is THE original emotionally vulnerable, almost nihilistic, TV
housewife/mum. Husband Ben, the dull butterfly collecting dentist (Geoffrey
Palmer from “As Time Goes By”), and sons, the usually unemployed Russell and
Adam (Nicholas Lyndhurst from “Only Fools and Horses”), barely notice Ria’s
decent into mid-life crisis. Her life becomes further complicated when she
meets the charming, recently divorced Leonard on her lunchtime walks in the
park. With her lack of domestic training and those stark echoing voiceover
musings, it’s not hard to think of Wendy Craig playing Ria as a 1970s London
Carrie Bradshaw (“Sex And The City”) – although one decked out in Marks and
Spencer rather than Christian Dior. I guess this makes her would-be-beau
Leonard a somewhat drearier suburban London version of Carrie’s Big – except
Leonard has a chauffeur who is played by a Hammer horror film veteran in
Michael Ripper!
Nellie Boswell – Liverpudlian matriarch
Check out
Bread-Series 1 and 2 - Disc 1 (1986)
In her follow up to “Butterflies”, writer Carla Lane calls on her Merseyside
working class roots to bring the struggling staunchly Catholic Boswell family
to the small screen. Nellie, whose husband Freddy has left her for a floosie
named “Lilo Lil”, is surrounded by her brood of five. None of the kids have
left home, and all of them survive on the dole and by selling dodgy gear. Very
much a reflection of Thatcher’s Britain in the 1980s, fans of “Bread” include
Paul and Linda McCartney, both of whom make a cameo appearance in a later
series. Look for the trademark scene involving Nellie passing around the
chicken-shaped collection bowl before serving dinner – and try to guess how
much dosh, if any, each sibling will place in it this time.
Barbara Royle – part-time bakery worker, full-time domestic dogsbody
‘Have you had yer tea yet Dave? Oooh, what d’ya have?’
Check out Episode One on
The Royle Family - Season 1 (1998)
In the 80s, Sue Johnston and Ricky Tomlinson played husband and wife Sheila and
Bobby Grant in the Liverpudlian soap “Brookside”. Here they team up again, this
time as Barbara and Jim Royle, heads of the Mancunian Royle family; a tribe who
seems permanently camped in their lounge room watching TV (as Jim notes: “Who
Wants To Be A Millionaire?” – ‘the best thing on television, bar none’). Barb
occasionally gets to lounge on the couch, only to have to shove over when
daughter Denise and son-in-law Dave arrive for their nightly post-tea chats. At
least Barb gets to ask Dave what he had for tea (‘corned beef hash’, Dairy Lea
on toast’, or ‘nothing’, depending on what Denise could be fagged cooking) –
and son Antony occasionally helps out, either getting a brew on or by heading
down to the shop for a pack of fags. Check out the first ever episode, when Jim
is apoplectic about a huge phone bill largely made up of calls Barb has made to
next door neighbour Mary.
Jo Frost – Supernanny!
‘It is basic expectations, Marianne, you do not punch your mother!’
Check out the episode
"The Weston Family" on Supernanny (US) - Season 1 - Disc 2 (2005)
Is Jo Frost the best substitute mother/disciplinarian since retired master
sergeant Emma arrived from the Wacs to fill in as maid for her cousin Alice in
“The Brady Bunch”? Supernanny’s task is to tame four year old Andrew, a real
little angel who delights in picking on his eleven month old brother and
calling his Mum ‘poo poo’. He can demand warm chocolate milk as much as he
likes, but you get the feeling the little swine has met his match here. The
British have always done a fine line in canine dominatrix – think Barbara
‘walkies’ Woodhouse in the 80s and Victoria Stilwell in the recent “It’s Me or
the Dog” – so introducing Americans to ‘the naughty chair’ of the Supernanny
seems the next logical step.. Pity Jo doesn’t do a celeb version and start by
strapping Fox News’ Bill O’Reilly to it!
Estelle Costanza – The Shame of the Mother
‘I don't understand you. I really don't. You have nothing better to do at 3:00
in the afternoon? Too bad you can't do that for a living. You'd be very
successful at it. You could sell out Madison Square Garden. Thousands of people
could watch you! You could be a big star!’
Check out the episode
"The Contest" on Seinfeld - Season 4 - Disc 2 (1990)
Perhaps if George Costanza hadn’t stayed living with his parents for so long
into his adult life he wouldn’t have felt so insecure and paranoid around his
bellowing, overbearing mother Estelle. Maybe he wouldn’t have been so obsessed
about the uncanny likeness between his mother and his fiancé Susan’s toy doll;
or got found out having left a condom wrapper on his parent’s matrimonial bed
when he used it to have sex while they were away on holiday; or caused his Mum
to wind up in hospital with a bad back after collapsing when she walked in on
George ‘treating his body like it was an amusement park!’
Edina 'Eddy' Monsoon
‘If you could look a little less like a Christian missionary then maybe we could
get along a little better’
Check out the episode
"Morocco" on Absolutely Fabulous-Series 2 (1992)
It’s the classic sitcom generation gap: Mother Eddy’s desperate desire for
wealth and fame versus daughter Saffy’s intellectual snobbery. In this episode,
Eddy’s PR firm has been enlisted to promote “Pop-Specs”. When Eddy’s friend
Patsy agrees to feature the hideous things in a fashion shoot in her magazine,
it’s off to Marrakech, Morocco. Saffy wants to tag along to study ‘the natives’
for her uni course, but this time it’s Patsy who objects to her presence on the
trip. With Saffy suffering the hazy after-effects from indulging in the
Moroccan hookah, it’s no surprise when Patsy manages to sell off ‘the bitch
troll daughter from Hell’ to slave traders. Of course Eddy hardly notices her
daughter is missing. On her eventual return, Saffy gets no help from Mum when
her dirty old friend ‘Uncle Humphrey’ declares his perverted intentions towards
Saffy
“Mum” (Jeanette) Brooks –Wentworth Detention Centre’s mother hen
Check out
Prisoner Cell Block H -Vol. 1 - Disc 1 (1978)
The opening episode of the long running drama sees Mum Brooks having served
fifteen years after euthanising her terminally ill husband. About to be
released on parole from Wentworth, we see her struggle to leave behind the
‘security’ of life inside, say goodbye to the small vegie patch she lovingly
tendered over the years, and attempt to reconcile with an indifferent daughter
still coming to terms with the crime that saw Mum incarcerated in the first
place. Look out for Val Jellay who lets Mum a room in a boarding house hovel.
When Mum falls while retrieving her suitcase from the top of a wardrobe, the
landlord goes straight for Mum’s purse to get what she’s owed in rent. Also
check out Mum gently but firmly warning Lynn Warner (Kerry Armstrong) not to
endanger Top Dog Bea Smith’s parole by lagging – it follows that memorable
scene in which Bea slams Lynn’s hand in the laundry’s steaming iron press.
Sophia Petrillo
Dorothy: Hi, ma. Where are you going?
Sophia: To the boardwalk. I like to watch the old guys rearrange themselves when
they come out of the water.
Check out the episode
"Ladies of the Evening" on The Golden Girls- Season 2 - Disc 1 (1985)
Before the indignity of playing Sylvester Stallone’s mother in “Stop! Or My Mom
Will Shoot” came this classic sitcom. Estelle Getty plays Sophia Petrillo, who
joins her daughter Dorothy in her Miami home after Sophia’s former residence,
the “Shady Pines” nursing home, burns down. Add Rose the naïve one, and Blanche
the promiscuous one, and you have the housemates that become “The Golden
Girls”. In this episode, Blanche wins (just) three tickets to the premiere and
after-party of Burt Reynolds’ new movie – and it’s Sophia who misses out on
going. So when the others end up in jail after being mistakenly nabbed as
prostitutes on their way to the night out, Sophia is the one who can bail them
out … or not.
Spike (Christine Nelson) – Degrassi Junior High single teenage mum
Spike: (going into labour): ‘Call my mom ……. QUICK!!!”
Check out the episode
"Pass Tense" on Degrassi Junior High -Season 2 - Disc 2 (1986)
The Degrassi Junior High graduation dance goes into TV folklore not only for
the debut of Joey, Wheels and Snake’s band “The Zit Remedy”, but also as the
event where Spike went into labour with daughter Emma. Named for her spiked
blonde hair, Spike was your classic 80s punk outsider; she later dated a guy
who was also into Irish punk-folkers “The Pogues”! Teen pregnancy isn’t easy
for Spike; one of Degrassi’s Farrell twins, Erica, tells her it’s impossible to
get pregnant the first time you have sex; the parents of the baby’s father
Shane are busy trying to ship him off to another school; and the Degrassi PTA
get her suspended for the ‘bad example’ she’s setting the other students. At
least her mum, once a single teen mum herself, supports her.
Scott's previous editorials...
-
Our Mums… on
TV May, 2007
-
TV’s April
Fools April, 2007
-
The Study of
Quickflix TV March, 2007
-
Valentine's
Day... it's a good day for a wedding February, 2007
-
A TV Tribute
to Cricket January, 2007
-
Animated
Villans February, 2006
-
Villans
January, 2006
-
TV Xmas
Treats December, 2005
-
The
Soundtrack to our Lives November, 2005
-
Vale Ronnie
Barker October, 2005
-
80's TV : A
beginner's guide September, 2005
-
TV's Greatest
Dads August, 2005